Follow the Yellow Brick Road

I guess the HCG is doing it's job since I'm going in tomorrow to have my...eggs....taken...out.

I think it just hit me that a part of me and not just a part of me but a part of my potential baby will be removed from me and put elsewhere. Elsewhere being OUTSIDE OF MY BODY. It's kind of like loaning someone your arm or something. And then there will be an embryo, our little  embryo, hanging out in some petri dish in a lab somewhere for a few days. I wonder if I can ask to see it first before they transfer it? Can I take a picture? Would my son/daughter be embarrassed if I brought that photo out with their naked bath pictures to show their dates? 

I don't know about you, but I would kind of like to see a picture of myself as an embryo. But wouldn't that be freaky??

This is all kind of mind-blowing. 

And there are the practical matters to consider. In amongst the consent forms and waivers and promises not to sue the doctor if this one doesn't "take" there are questions like, how will the embryos be disposed of/utilized in the event of my death, my husband's death or both of our deaths. We have one of five choices for that one: donate to research; thaw with no further action; donate to another couple; abandonment to the center; use by living partner. I know what I would do if, God forbid, he died, but wouldn't it be hard for my husband to "use" the embryos should I suddenly croak between tomorrow and next week? Would he want our baby so much he would hire a surrogate? These are not the typical discussions my hubby and I partake in. 

If we do have "extras" we are going to freeze them and pay the 300 plus yearly fee to hold them, just in case we need to do it again. 

And then the all important question of HOW MANY. 2? 3? I'm no Octo-mom wanna-be so, definitely not more than that. Luckily, I don't have to answer this question by tomorrow and can instead see what happens and hopefully the doctor can tell us what is best. But ultimately, it will be our decision.

It's Wednesday afternoon on a partly cloudy day in Southern California and I am seriously pondering the fate of  yet to be created potential being(s), part of whom will be extracted from my body tomorrow. 

Dorothy, you're not in Kansas anymore.